i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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