I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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