I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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