covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
Randomize
