There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
Redeem this text for a blowjob
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize