If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
foreskin is a definite game changer
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
