he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
