He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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