is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
Walk of Shame today included voting.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Because you touch yourself at night.
...What time of day am I supposed to do it?
My ex's new gf is pregnant and he is sterile, so 2016 is starting off well.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
