we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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