Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
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