if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just handed a girl a slice of pizza and she handed me her number. Is this how Vegas hookups normally begin?
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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