the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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