Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
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