the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Randomize
