You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
