I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
I love you. Go after that dick
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize