Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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