Texts From Last Night

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  (949): View more from California

  who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool

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  (949): who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool http://tfl.nu/a4ly
  Replies (7) Good night (1168) Bad night (1733)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home

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  (919): Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home http://tfl.nu/42nr
  Replies (59) Good night (2607) Bad night (509)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved

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  (386): Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved http://tfl.nu/rva0
  Replies (10) Good night (2922) Bad night (833)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.

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  (336): I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort. http://tfl.nu/myrl
  Replies (11) Good night (638) Bad night (2653)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.

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  (413): I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic. http://tfl.nu/sxvb
  Replies (80) Good night (31418) Bad night (1146)
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  (619): View more from California

  Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep

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  (619): Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep http://tfl.nu/5i99
  Replies (21) Good night (1218) Bad night (2579)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive

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  (609): imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive http://tfl.nu/r061
  Replies (50) Good night (4140) Bad night (1033)
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  (816): View more from Missouri

  They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze

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  (816): They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze http://tfl.nu/jmci
  Replies (4) Good night (4359) Bad night (1104)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating

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  (603): He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating http://tfl.nu/fvws
  Replies (10) Good night (3366) Bad night (964)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.

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  (709): The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave. http://tfl.nu/fq86
  Replies (2) Good night (1134) Bad night (767)
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  (310): View more from California

  I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.

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  (310): I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are. http://tfl.nu/tz5c
  Replies (1) Good night (1780) Bad night (429)
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  (817): View more from Texas

  Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.

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  (817): Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light. http://tfl.nu/nfnq
  Replies (5) Good night (486) Bad night (972)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.

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  (801): I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird. http://tfl.nu/5cem
  Replies (3) Good night (886) Bad night (789)
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  (540): View more from Virginia

  You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.

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  (540): You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you. http://tfl.nu/4u5p
  Replies (6) Good night (2085) Bad night (694)
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  (250): View more from British Columbia

  i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.

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  (250): i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties. http://tfl.nu/5hso
  Replies (0) Good night (749) Bad night (150)

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