Texts From Last Night

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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Old men and throwing up are my life now.

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  (504): Old men and throwing up are my life now. http://tfl.nu/h5tg
  Replies (10) Good night (744) Bad night (2388)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.

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  (412): Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head. http://tfl.nu/0n78
  Replies (114) Good night (8841) Bad night (1381)
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  (710): View more from

  Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!

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  (710): Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?! http://tfl.nu/2llb
  Replies (12) Good night (681) Bad night (4601)
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  (925): View more from California

  im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?

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  (925): im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going? http://tfl.nu/wvih
  Replies (65) Good night (5164) Bad night (1619)
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  (845): View more from New York

  we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'

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  (845): we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class' http://tfl.nu/85i4
  Replies (38) Good night (1737) Bad night (6289)
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  (413): View more from Massachusetts

  They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.

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  (413): They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket. http://tfl.nu/y613
  Replies (23) Good night (4792) Bad night (2596)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical.

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  (870): To celebrate your birthday last night, I got drunk and sang drift away in buffalo wild wings. Happy birthday. The entire bar sang the chorus with me. It was magical. http://tfl.nu/vs7y
  Replies (4) Good night (2975) Bad night (817)
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  (416): View more from Toronto

  The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often

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  (416): The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often http://tfl.nu/ivea
  Replies (7) Good night (2298) Bad night (773)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.

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  (602): Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair. http://tfl.nu/b6aa
  Replies (7) Good night (955) Bad night (1862)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  you said candy land and then passed out.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.

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  (215): you said candy land and then passed out. (215): ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks. http://tfl.nu/gx08
  Replies (8) Good night (3055) Bad night (606)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.

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  (901): Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn. http://tfl.nu/sdqi
  Replies (6) Good night (654) Bad night (2033)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger

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  (+61): The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger http://tfl.nu/x8sq
  Replies (4) Good night (619) Bad night (1184)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course

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  (612): It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course http://tfl.nu/673n
  Replies (2) Good night (1260) Bad night (515)
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  (772): View more from Florida

  She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.

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  (772): She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times. http://tfl.nu/p3ry
  Replies (5) Good night (1747) Bad night (683)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw

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  (478): I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw http://tfl.nu/f5v8
  Replies (6) Good night (248) Bad night (387)

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