I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem