Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
my vag is so smooth its legendary
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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