You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
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