Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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