A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
