it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He called his prostate his "boner button".
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
And then my night got REAL pukey
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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