Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
