Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Randomize
