Pants 0. Shit 1.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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