These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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