his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
I crashed her parents' car cause she was giving me road head. Its probably best to just let them think I'm a bad driver.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize
