I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Be still, my beating vagina.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
