Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize