What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
