I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
When you get this divorce finalized we're going to mid evil times AND pirate dining adventure. We're gonna find you a couple of real men and make them joust/swashbuckle for your affection. My treat.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Randomize
