Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
