It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
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