OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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