Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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