I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
