I'm drive I can fine osifer
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I'm trying to arrange "Flawless" to come on as soon as I get up to leave the room after my thesis defense. Bow down bitches indeed.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
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