Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Randomize
