Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
I need to stop coming to work sober
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
