that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Randomize
