It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
Randomize
