Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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