We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize