good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Randomize