that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
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He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
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I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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