I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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