Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Randomize
