I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
